6 Questions You Know You Want to Ask a SAHM

I’ve been a stay at home mom (SAHM) for just over four years. And in that time I’ve received a lot of questions about my decision to stay home.  

Although being a stay at home mom is not a new phenomenon, it is making resurgence after being dormant for decades. Some view it as a return to tradition while others see it as a new norm.  

As such, there is some mystery about it.  

Here’s six questions I’m asked a lot:

What made you want to be a SAHM?

It was a combination of things. When I was young, my mother stayed home and I believe it greatly benefited my development. I also didn’t want to miss any of my daughter’s important milestones. Financially, it made more sense for me to stay home, being that daycare costs would’ve consumed my paycheck. Speaking of, it doesn’t help that daycares are in the news every other day for negligent behavior. All around for my family, it was better for me to stay home.

Are you rich?

That’s a definite no. In fact, part of the reason why we decided that I would stay home is, again, because the majority of my paycheck would have gone toward daycare and gas. I also know moms who lost money by working full and paying for daycare, so staying home was actually the cheaper option. We definitely had to adjust to living off one salary, but it also taught us that we were paying for a lot of stuff that we didn’t need. We save a lot more with me staying home than we ever did when I worked full time.

Aren’t you wasting your education/skills?

No. Just because a woman stays home doesn’t mean she’s not using her skills and education. I have three degrees in English and before I had my daughter, I was a college English professor. When I first started staying home, I taught one college English class online. Now I’m a published author, writing coach, and self-publishing coach. Clearly I’m using my education and skills. I know many SAHMs who own their own businesses or work as freelance consultants.

How do you socialize your children?

I’m a SAHM, not a hermit. Just because I don’t work outside the home doesn’t make us a family of recluses. It really is a misconception that daycare, and school for that matter, is the only way to socialize children. Playdates, neighborhood activities and recreational classes are great ways to ensure socialization.  

When are you going back to work?

Personally, I don’t plan on ever going back to a 9-5 job. It’s just not my cup of tea. I love being home with my daughter, and I love working for myself. I mean, who says you HAVE to work a 9-5 job?  

How do you find fulfillment in your life without working?

Staying at home doesn’t mean a life of dreams deferred. I love being home with my daughter and watching her learn and grow. I am fulfilled as a parent. I love taking care of my household, making sure it runs smoothly, and taking care of my husband. I am fulfilled as a wife. I love writing my books and running my company. I am fulfilled with my work. I read and do crafts all the time. I am fulfilled in my hobbies. Bottom Line: I am fulfilled way more now, than I ever was when I worked outside the home. I’m not saying that being a SAHM is for everyone, because it isn’t, but for some it’s the best decision we’ve ever made. Different stroke for different folks, you know?

Amanda Chambers
Amanda is a mostly crunchy, stay at home, retro-loving mompreneur. She’s been married to her husband for 10 years and they have one daughter whom they proudly homeschool. Amanda, who lives in Saint Petersburg, is originally from Baltimore, Maryland but called North Carolina home for two decades, so you can say she has the grit of a northerner but the charm of a southern belle. Prior to staying home, Amanda was a college English professor. She’s now an author, writing coach, and self-publishing guru. She loves all things crafty and DIY, and can usually be found covered in paint or glitter.

9 COMMENTS

  1. This was informative and well written ( we expect nothing less). It was succinct and not preachy. Way to educate and inspire future SAHMs Soror!

  2. I love it! Clearly, you have found the perfect balance for yourself and your family. I am sure that you will give inspiration for those that aren’t quite sure they could handle the task. Nice job!

  3. Amanda touched just about everything is SAHM are questioned on. I’ve been a stay at home mom now for two years. As I don’t regret it one but!!! Great read Amanda!! Look forward to reading more from you!

  4. Great article!!!! I’m a fellow work-from-home mom, and it was the best decision for my family. I’ve been asked all of these questions and more and your answers were spot on!

  5. This is a simple & amazing read .. I never knew how to answer these questions before when I’ve been asked. It seems obvious but I would always feel like I was being attacked about my decision to be a SAHM. This makes me a little more comfortable in how to answer and being sure of myself by saying you know what “Different strokes for Different folks!” Thanks for the boost in confidence… may not seem like much but a little goes a long way!

    A TX SAHM

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