No One Fights Alone: When Life Gives You Childhood Cancer, You Create a FRAMILY

In case anyone was wondering, CHILDHOOD CANCER SUCKS! Cancer sucks the life and health out of the people we love and it kills their future. Cancer destroys lives and relationships. As much as I don’t like cancer, I must share the best thing that cancer ever did for my sister.

When Life Gives You Cancer

 

In 2014 when my nephew was diagnosed with childhood cancer, my sister had a good amount of family support. Her siblings and close friends rallied around her and her family, helping in every way that we could. Our mantra, ‘no one fights alone’. And we made sure that she didn’t. We were there during hospital stays and cancer walks. Our kids did chemo pill dances and holiday celebrations during hospital stays. We wore the shirts, the colors and we said the prayers. We did everything in our power to be there for her during one of the most stressful and emotional times of her life.

What we couldn’t give her was the support of solidarity. The kind that only another cancer family could give her. I could say, ‘yes, my nephew had cancer’ but I could never say ‘my son had cancer’. The deep agonizing fear of possibly losing your child is one that I can not describe because honestly, I’ve never felt that. I don’t know what it’s like to have cancer threaten my child. No one does…until your doctor tells you, ‘I’m sorry, your child has cancer.’

Create A Framily

About two years ago, my sister met her tribe through the Children’s Cancer Center. I can’t really explain to you how they met or what transpired to bring these families together. But what I can say is that my sister’s life seems more complete with this amazing support group.

They call themselves ‘Framily’. Five diverse families from five different walks of life and childhood cancer brought them together. I’ve had the pleasure of being around the Framily and it’s like a monthly family reunion. I honestly feel like I’ve known the families my entire life. And although I can not share the connection of a child with cancer, they have embraced me and my family as well.

 

My sister describes the framily as ‘a group of friends who turns into your family. Being able to be your true self without apologizing for your true emotions.’ For my sister, connecting with this group of ladies is a blessing. To find a tribe that is genuine is so rare, yet, here it was a friendship bore from pain.

My sister said, ‘I really love these ladies. We are a Framily. I read a quote that said, ‘Maybe I can’t stop the downpour, but I will always join you for a walk in the rain.’ We all had our moments of rainstorms, God has blessed us with genuine people who will always walk with each other in the rain…no explanations needed, no judgment, no pity party. Just being there for each other…Physically, emotionally, and spiritually. I love my cancer Framily.’

Walking in the Rain

 

In the very beginning of September, Jayden, one the kids in the framily, had an emergency. Jayden was having difficulty breathing, and he was admitted to the hospital. His health declining, he became unable to eat or talk. Mom asked for prayers for her son. What she also received was the unwavering love and support from her tribe. The Framily sprung into action the minute they received text messages about Jayden. This was a very big storm that mom was facing and they were all walking with her in the rain.

Although each mom has their own children and home to care for, they each made a decision to be there for Jayden and his family. The framily has all taken turns being present and holding a spiritual umbrella over mom’s head. At this moment, Jayden has six moms all willing to go the distance for him, willing him to fight and promising to fight with him. Because no one ever fights alone. Especially if you’re part of the #framily.